Remember when princesses and princes were the standard of love. Everything seemed so simple then. Kissing frogs, going on adventures, fancy clothes, and most importantly, every story ending in happily ever after.
As we get older, things get complicated. Does he love me? Does she not love me? We are in a constant tug of war with our hearts, attempting to grasp the idea of love that we desire. Many times, we do not feel as though our standards are achievable and settle for second best. The ones that want us and are easily attained because we need something to keep us from giving up on the idea of love.
“We accept the love that we think we deserve.”, this quote was said in the movie and book, Perks of Being A Wallflower. It does not sound like something that we should struggle with. Be confident, find healthy loving relationships. And yet, we all struggle.
Back in high school when all we wanted was to feel as though we belong to the crowds so, we push ourselves to find someone to belong to, we struggled.
When we come home just to lock ourselves in our room, blasting music, and demanding the freedoms that we think we deserve, we struggled.
When we go out with friends and we are always the one that is left out, the third wheel of the group, we struggled.
We even fail to realize that love is so much more than a boyfriend, a girlfriend, a husband, a wife. Love is your friends. Love is your family. Love is yourself.
They say that you cannot love someone else until you love yourself. I suppose to an extent, that is true. Love yourself so deeply that you will not settle for anything less than you deserve. That is a simple enough idea. However, I disagree simultaneously.
You do not have to love yourself to truly love someone else, they are a package deal. As I have grown older, my definition of love has changed countless times. I recently concluded that love is not anything measurable or vast. Love is merely the idea of caring about someone so passionately and deeply that we cannot help but falling in love with ourselves and the person that we are when we are around them.
Love is sacrifice. – It seems like this is one of the most common praises to define love. And personally, I do not agree. I believe that true love, a love that is madly and deeply intoxicating, does not take without the open hands from the giver. Love does not ask for us to give things that we will miss. Rather, love merely asks us to question and fully develop our priorities. That is not sacrifice. Sacrifice painful and scary. That, that is not love.
Love is not pain. Love is not hard. Love is not fear.
In conclusion, love is hard to describe and even harder to want. Although it seems impossible much of the time, we will achieve it, maybe you already have. Maybe not in a boyfriend, or a wife. Maybe not even in our families. But we deserve love, no doubt about that.